Brenda's Pov

I looked at Lucia my Mate my.l beautiful woman laying in amrs as I hold her so close to me not wanting to let her go ever from my hold. We cry the and talk the hole night through until I forces her to sleep be I felt how ex she was. She was really emotional drain and it was all because of me and I couldn't let it happen any further because I don't want any harm to the people I even told her why I was so scared when I found out that she was using drugs because it reminded me when I was pregnant with LJ which leads to another topic when she asked me who is LJ's father.

I couldn't answer her right away because it wasn't the right time to talk about it and she needed to rest. I didn't sleep because I couldn't I felt so bad that I wasn't here for her and I'm so grateful for my family who was here for here. She also told me that she couldn't sleep because everytime she would close her eyes everything just came back and it was hard for her because it feel like she is going through it all over again. It breaks me when she told me that and that's why she went and use drugs because it makes her feel good and relaxed.

I couldn't stop telling her how sorry I was and we are now laying together feeling so at peace but I couldn't because the men for my mate's pain is out there and thinking about that I need to see Jerome making me growl feeling Lucia shift in my arms. I look down at her she was beautiful her hair was longer then her first one I guess being a vampire  changed few of her features making her look like a goddess. I kiss down on her for head hugging her tigth close to me feeling happy to have her this close to me.

This has changed our life really she wouldn't be the same again but I'm glad that's she still love my daughter the same way. She still don't know what to do about the baby but I told her to keep it and that we will love her like our own child but she just couldn't because it will remain her of Jerome and that guy which she don't want to look at her child like that. I wanted to tell her that I was also rape and that's where LJ's came in but I just couldn't I was just to hard for me bit I think it's about time I talk out and help my Mate.

Mom need to let her talk to someone she needs to just to get some weight from her shoulders. I want use to leave this place and just go away from here and leave all bad memories behind and move on happily.

I kiss her again on forehead putting her lose black hair behind her hand looking at her beautiful face gulping down when feeling my heart skip a beat I miss this so much. She makes me feel so alive and happy.  I look down at her pink lips as I crave to kiss it which is going to be a problem because we going to need to overcome so many things.

I need her to wake up we need to bath and go to breakfast we need to bring back the happiness of this house I have heart everything chrissy told her and it was true but it wasn't just her mistake but mine too and we going to do it together to bring back the joy of this clan we going to rule this clan together no matter. Thinking of Jacky making me smile with a smirk on my face what happened there with them. We thought she was killing chrissy for a moment there I laugh seeing Lucia embarrassed face of last she was so embarrassed but was really angry for Jacky for her hurting her sister. I should have told her that things happened and that I'm so glad that she is isn't a human anymore we need to be so careful around them.

I look at her seeing her beautiful eyes staring at me making me smile as I caressing her cheek never taking my eyes from her as we just stare at each other enjoy being this close in each other arms. She did something that really shock me because I didn't know if she was ready of not so I didn't kiss her back I didn't want to take advantage of her being vulnerable. I love her to much and I know being intimate will take us long to get there.

She stop kissing me as she look at me, please kiss me she said and press her lips against mine as she push me down in my back and straddling me as we kiss each other making me moan out. I miss her so much I miss her kissing me and I just couldn't say to no to her as I kiss her back but I was scared to touch her. The kiss was slow and passionate we did not rush we express our love in this kiss as our tongues collide feeling her fight to shove her tongue into my mouth as I open my mouth for her to shove her tongue in hearing her moan with her hands roaming down my body.

"To..uc.h me." she said still kissing me thus time a little hard as she bit on my lip making me moan. I put my hands on her back caressing it sofly as I pushed her down on me hearing moan.

"Stop, please stop! she scream as she move so fast away from falling into wall and fall down on the floor crying.

" Please just stop." I move to her and pick up into my arms holding her close to me.

" It's okay darling, it's just me I'm here now it" okay. "I told her feeling her relaxed as she hold me back.

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